I found myself in Church yesterday. I was raised Muslim and I can’t remember the last time I stepped inside a Mosque, perhaps from a paranoid fear that I’ll be outed as a pagan. I have, however been in a church once before, and that was as a child attending Brownies. I have a hazy memory of being dressed as a bear, singing ”Who Built the Ark?’, only to be later chastised by Brown Owl for being part of the worst performance ever. It all merged together to equal churches and singing just don’t work…
London is getting colder and I wasn’t sure the Gothic church would be any warmer. I was there because Sam’s friend is an Opera Singer – she has a voice which has such beauty and is a sound unlike anything I have heard before; she was singing with the choral society. I was excited to hear her but other than that I held no expectations for the choral music concert.
Then the choir started singing and I was transported. It was passionate, powerful and I felt myself pulled into their spiritual sound. As they sang I found myself Quieten and my breathing become slower and deeper. I closed my eyes and for a moment I allowed the music to deliver me to a meditative peace. The singing paused and the hall echoed with a deep silence. I opened my eyes. My immediate thought was why I know longer meditated. My spiritual side is profoundly important to me and I had at one point followed organised religion and then stopped preferring to explore my own personal dialogue with a Higher Being, away from the constraints of others. But in a foreign place of worship I had drifted into meditation; in a room filled with people all focused on the sounds they could hear. As the choir raised their voices in harmony I reluctantly questioned myself as to why I won’t pray especially as I have experienced spiritual calm through it. Is it because I’m stubbornly clinging to an old fight? ‘Bowing your head to a Higher Being is spiritually humbling. It’s the acknowledgement that there is something greater than you out there’ I had later allowed myself to admit to Sam.
As I left, I turned to look at the orchestra and the singers and I thought about the passion and belief they had individually brought together to create such beautiful music.
My Spirit, had it stood by my side for a moment, I am certain would have stopped and bowed its head to the Beauty that their Love had just sculpted.